A Joke to Deal With Immigration Problems

I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed. What a beauty of a bird feeder it is, as I filled it lovingly with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food.

But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above the table, and next to the barbecue. Then came the poop. It was everywhere: on the patio tile, the chairs, the table … everywhere!

Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket. And others birds were boisterous and loud. They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food.

After a while, I couldn’t even sit on my own back porch anymore. So I took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone. I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio.Soon, the back yard was like it used to be … quiet, serene and no one demanding their rights to a free meal.

Now let’s see….

Our government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, and free education and allows anyone born here to be an automatic citizen.

Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands. Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments are housing 5 families; you have to wait 6 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor; your child’s 2nd grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn’t speak English.

Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to ‘press one’ to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than ‘Old Glory’ are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.

Just my opinion, but maybe it’s time for the government to take down the bird feeder. If you agree, pass it on; if not, continue cleaning up the poop!

20 thoughts on “A Joke to Deal With Immigration Problems

  1. Pingback: Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson Joke

  2. Bob

    I bought some land in the middle of a forest. It was real nice, I loved the surroundings.

    I was surrounded by wildlife which was nice but I needed the room to expand so, I forced out all of the wild life for about 25 acres so I could have my space. I had to fight them almost daily but once I killed enough of them they stopped coming back. I had a big garden and for the first decade or so my garden was fine
    It made great produce. I had enough I was able to sell extra in town at the farmer’s market.

    But about ten years after I moved in I realized my produce was dwindling. Without the original inhabitants the land wasn’t as fertile. Because I had to buy fertilizer, I had to raise my prices for my vegetables and this angered the folks in the city. They said it was wrong to charge so much for what were needs of American citizens.

    I had to let some of the original inhabitants back on my land to help me with my produce business. I would feed them with rotting vegetables and other scraps that my domesticated animals wouldn’t eat. They rewarded me by providing me with plenty of fertilizer and my gardening business flourished once again.

    The lower prices made the people in town happy again and all was great again for a few more years. But eventually the word got out to the original inhabitants of my land that there was food to be had again. Unfortunately I didn’t have enough rotten food to give them so they went on into town looking for food. At first they would hang around fast food places and eat the food nobody else would eat. Then when that food ran out they went around to other businesses and they were always willing to take the food that nobody else wanted.

    But soon the people in town started saying you know there isn’t enough food here. They first thing they noticed is that the original inhabitants of my land were eating plenty of food. They said “Hey there sure are a lot of those animals eating food. Shouldn’t they go back where they came from and eat food there?”

    Oh that’s right; they are BACK where they came from…

    It’s not even compassion, it is logic.

    Reply
    1. kijafha

      So bob, you got wild animals to help you with a garden and they didn’t just eat up the crops and crap all over everything? This sounds like some multiculturalist propaganda fable from Disney or something.
      PS: Mexicans aren’t native Americans, Americans are native Americans. Doesn’t that make more sense. That’s because it’s non-fiction.

      Reply
      1. Beto

        Mexicans are native Americans, because 80% of them are pure Indigenous or are Mestizos (half white, half Indian)and they were born on the American Continent, that makes them natives of the American continent or native Americans. “Americans” are U.S. Citizen and not Americans, check your passport under “citizenship”

        Reply
  3. daisysock

    I thought it was thought provoking JOKE with some truth behind it. If you have no sense of humor don’t read a JOKE that might enrage you enough to write a story as a comment. I guess maybe no one should be allowed to JOKE about things others might consider stupid or offensive….well there probably wouldn’t be any then.

    Reply
  4. matt

    you’re quite disagreeable and bigoted, aren’t you?

    i sense this from reading a handful of your self-important blogs. your rant against teenagers comes off as having the same earnest compassion as an old man beating the sh!t out of his remorseful hound.

    it’s obvious you haven’t found peace or happiness yet and i hope you do (but it’s more likely ýou’ll continue to be ground to agry dust by this life).

    take responsibility for your loneliness. stop letting taxes and scary foreign people stress you into a seething frenzy.

    oh, and thanks kensavage.com for the hot totty recipe, my cold is killing me.

    anyhow, i certainly won’t be surfing this way again.

    Reply
  5. OneVoice

    We are one of the richest nations in the world. Many of our corporations have entered into Mexico, and other 3rd world nations with NAFTA and other treaties to make record profits to the demise of our workforce because the people down there work at low pay and long hours.

    Then our news media and citizens blame those seeking better lives, as did our ancestors, by coming here and seeking our good christian aid to better their lives. The media and many people who proclaim their christianity and subservience to the divine master and great feeder of masses, while passing on emails such as these, demanding that we stop being a charitable
    nation, and instead embrace anger toward these faceless people.

    I think that it isn’t really charity if it is easy and doesn’t test us spiritually in some manner. This issue has been ridden by the likes of Lou Dobbs and Charlie Daniels, who both proclaim themselves as christian, yet what message did Jesus tell us to carry? To deny those who seek succor?

    I think that this is a terrible issue, and I don’t know the answer. I know that comparing people to birds is not really accurate or appropriate. Some people have used that argument to justify stopping aid to starving nations like Africa, or regions, like Appalachia…saying that these people if they are fed, will only reproduce and create more hunger…and I can’t get my head around viewing people in this manner, as animals, or rats.

    I live and teach in an area that is heavilly populated with immigrants, and I’ve never seen a classroom where 50% of the students didn’t speak English, so I’m not sure where these numbers come from…other than to say they obviously come from the emotions of people trying to enflame the emotions of
    other people.

    If my response offends you, then good, maybe it will make you think. Either way, you don’t have to pass it on, just know that I am one christian who believes that my faith tries me on a regular basis to change the way I think…less like a sheep, and more like a lamb.

    These words are just the words of onevoice crying out in the wilderness to remind people that love is the answer, and it isn’t
    easy loving in this complicated world, but even still….love.

    Reply
    1. kijafha

      Give the christian angle a rest will you. It doesn’t say anything about supporting massive illegal immigration in the bible and even if it did it wouldn’t matter.
      And there’s a difference between Appalachia, Africa and Mexico. Americans are only responsible for the one’s in Appalachia. If you send your money overseas to a company that takes a cut and tells you you’re a hero just so you can feel self-righteous then you’re a sucker and a fool. If you really wanted to help a foreign people you’d grow a pair and go do it instead of sending guilt money.

      Reply
  6. Ken Savage Post author

    OneVoice, I agree with you in some parts. Putting religion aside it’s just a good thing to help out a fellow human when they need it.

    Although it was just a joke that I find also maybe me think about why we do these things to immigrants in this country. Did citizens say we don’t want to help people entering into America or was it the Government saying so?

    I have a problem with someone coming into this country and demanding the helping and leeching off the tax money we provided and then when they’re well off or saved some money just leave and go elsewhere.

    Some times illegal immigrants don’t end up paying for any services and cost this country more than it should.

    If a man or women walks down my street and falls and hurts their self I’ll come out and help them. If they were hungry or sick I would feed them and get them attention. But if I knew they would take some much and turn around and go back to their country to get their friends and do the same thing. I’d have to think twice.

    Reply
  7. xhydra

    just like you took of the bird feeder(or whatever) why don’t you remove the contextual adsense on this article coz they are advertising immigration services therefore contributing even more to your so called ‘Problem’…

    here is my joke for you
    “This problem with illegal immigration is nothing new. In fact, the Indians had a special name for it. They called it ‘white people.’” –Jay Leno

    Reply
    1. kijafha

      Really? What’s the name of this country that white people illegally invaded. Where were the borders? When was it founded? Can you quote the law they broke?
      You can’t illegally immigrate to vacant mosquito infested swampland that Indians didn’t own or want.

      Reply
  8. Beto Wilson

    The bird feeder is a bad and stupid example to explain our situation with immigration. A better example to describe this socioeconomic phenomenon is the model of “Supply and Demand”. Society can not demand Fast Food restaurants to close just because we have an excess of overweigh individuals. But, if we teach these individuals to eat healthy, the fast food restaurants will close own their own due to lack of customers. Best Buy hardly sells VCR’s, because there is no demand for this product, so manufactures stop their production, nobody mandated them to stop production, demand told them to stop production

    The capitalist system is based and fueled by profits, dividends, bonuses, output, outturn, percentage, proceeds earnings. Labor is the biggest expense any business has, that’s why raises are few and far between. So, if you are able to cut expenses, that means more profits. Employers wanting to compete and be more profitale will cut corners and break the law. Our country has a thirst for cheap labor and illicit drugs. If we have a “demand” for these products the “supply” will manifest by itself. You kill the demand and the supply will disappear into thin air. But, if we demand Americans business to pay decent wages to Americans, two things will happen; One, they will outsource the jobs. Two, products and services will cost a lot more. So, let’s be careful for what we wish for.

    Reply
    1. kijafha

      That’s kinda crazy man, neither here nor there. Like saying, “If there’s a demand for murder-for-hire then the supply will be there; we just need to work on the demand.” Wrong, fool.
      You go after everyone that’s breaking the law, those who want it and those who supply it. Then the problem will be solved and THEN the market will balance itself.

      Reply
  9. ben rotten

    Your page is deceptive and it sucks. I was searching for mexican jokes but all of your illegal links come back to this page. Search eging keyword stuffing and spamming at its best. Your one of the reasons the net sucks.

    Reply
  10. Illegal Hater

    maybe when YOUR kids fall behind in an AMERICAN school because they can’t speak SPANISH well enough, you morons will understand the concept of LEGAL immigration, and what you pansy save the worlders have destroyed.

    Reply
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